We’ve all been there: that horrible place between high-fiving and hand-holding. THE FRIEND ZONE DA DA DAAAAM. So here it is: 9 sentence that probably mean you’re friend-zoned and how we think you should reply to them.

1. “You make me think of my Labrador”

Sooooo does that mean I can lick you? Your abs to be specific.

2. “You’re like one of the guys!”

Screw you great grandmother for my flat chest genes.

3. “Hey dude, can you give me the number of your model friend? The blonde one?”

She died.

10. “Have you met my girlfriend?”

You mean me right? RIGHT??? RIIIIIGHT!

4. “Can you maybe pay for lunch? I’m all out man.”

Yes. But then you’ll have to work for it.

5. “You are SUCH a great friend”

I’m a better kisser. Grrrrowl.

6. “Can you babysit my cat for the weekend?”

Can I be your cat for a weekend? I’ll cuddle much better than that cat of yours. Purrrr…

7. “Let us go to that all-you-can-eat thing on Wednesday?”

I LOVE YOU.

8. “Can you pretend to be my girlfriend, so I can make Ashley jealous?”

Can’t I just BE your girlfriend?

9. “Can you check out the zit on my back?

Can you check the one on my lips. With your lips? Thanks.

Aaaand if our suggested replies don’t bag you a boyfriend, well then there’s a gazillion better things to do any way. Don’t believe us? Read it for yourself then: Fun things to do all by your perfect self